WHAT I DO

I kind of flinch when someone asks what I do and the answer I give is voicework or voiceovers.  I get the blank stare you'd give because they don't know what that is.  Funny thing is, that definition changes.  Sometimes it's acting by voice, sometimes it's announcing - seriously or friendly.  Sometimes short little tags: "BLAMMO, The First Name in Lethal Ammunition." Or full commercials.  Or narrations.  Anything you can conceive is narrated these days by someone somewhere.  Since everyone with a computer and internet and microphone is now also able to claim the term "voiceover," many don't sound good or have good enough SOUND.  These wanna-bes will work almost for free.  This has horribly devalued the rates over the years.  Unless it's union (rare) the average spot would pay less than it did in 1978.

Often clients will ask for something they already know - clone Morgan Freeman and you'll make a ton, or Mike Rowe (Deadliest Catch), for Ford.  Or a type... like... spoof this or imitate that.  (This won't work well with bad copy.)  

This leads me to this spoof of direct tv's latest campaign.  I think the script was well written and paced as that's the key to this working.  See and hear what you think. Click on this link below.

Spoof Direct TV spot

DREAMS

I dreamt last night that I was having trouble sleeping. This is a breakthrough! I have had the "I have to find the bathroom in this big place" dream where I awake to find I have to go to the bathroom. I've had that "falling" thing a few times when I was younger but not lately.

I wish I could control what happens in my dreams - but the unconscious, the brain's Drive In Theater, books its own shows nightly.

I know I dream in color sometimes or even all the time but I only notice once in a while where it makes sense in the story of that dream. A red car. That kind of thing.

I absolutely have had audio dreams which sounded completely real and I thought I was awake, but wasn't. Just this morning I swear I heard the doorbell. Only it wasn't. If I SAW something with the vividness of that doorbell sound, well, it'd be much much more vivid than the strength of my normal dreaming.

I fell asleep while doing homework in high school and found I had written "head engine room ok" in my notebook. I told some friends and they took opportunities to joke about it. Better than 'head engine room NOT ok,' I think.

I have tried to force dreams by trying to stay awake and focused on a scenario but it doesn't work.

I went to a place to study out of body travel (of the spirit, I guess). Whatever that ride is like, I am sorry to say I haven't any personal experience, but think it'd be really cool!

THE AMAZING GROWING DOG

You feed him kibble and water and he grows.  It's like Ghia Pet!

While a tiny pup Chester was so cute.  Now I have to look for photo ops to try to capture his 5-month-old look.  He's still cute, but maybe doggily related to awkward teen (in dog years he should be 3 and a half, but you get the idea.)

He's been in the pool several times.  We even took him to the local dog park and he ran around in 96 degree heat while we watched and sweated.  Too hot, I think, but when it cools, we'll be back!

I awake at 6AM and feed him, then we go for the morning walk before it heats up.  We both enjoy the cool before the sun comes up, the sunrise show, birds, and rabbits everywhere.  Sadly, there was a dead one on the side of the road, and I had to distract Chester from this yummy reminder of mortality.

HAPPILY AFTER EVER

It's time for an update.  Today's so slow I fixed my nose/earhair trimmer.

But what's wrong with slow?  Well, other than in the Olympics...

Most recently I am on the T and V on a spot in the NW.  Portland and all that.  It's for a credit union.  I am the voice that speaks off camera (mercifully) as my grown daughter dances at her wedding and I reminisce before I remind anyone in their emotional peak about the credit union.  Hey.  I can post it.

I guess that's "me" dancing with "my little girl."  Or she married an older guy. Is he old enough to be her father?

A very nice piece, producers.  Thanks for the work!  (They hired me off an audition and used the audition.)  Recorded right here.  That always blows my mind.  Another relatively recent sponsor VO I did was on SIRIUS/XM, beaming from space... and recorded down the hall.)