"I'VE HAD THEM FOR A WHILE."

There it is, men, the trick answer.

"Are those new shoes?"

"No, I've had them for a while."

Ah ha! We have found the trick. I believe I saw the rabbit.

You see, men, women, according to my new theory, actually buy and STOCKPILE shoes, so indeed, that statement isn't untrue.

And if, like Terri, your wife handles the money, well, you'll never know exactly.

What to do about it?

There's nothing you can do. Smile and nod. Say "They're nice." For extra credit say, "They make your legs look fabulous." But beware the trap: "You mean my legs don't usually look good?" Your response should then be: "Always, great. Now, fabulous." Just know that this might send her back to the store to look for that same model in other colors.

At our house, I tend to hold off on buying small, inexpensive things... And go for that new digital camera for $1,000.

And so, there's no way I could ever object to shoe hoarding, unless Terri sees this and uses it against me.