I don't remember what it was in the LOWES lot - Frasier Fir maybe... (speaking of Frasier and by the way - the Kelsey Grammar interview on Shatner's Raw Nerve was amazing.)
We wanted one with nice pine scent. Something more natural than an open bottle of Lysol with an athletic sock wick.
My job was to insure water was in the base, to keep it embalmed. I was diligent.
We noticed that the tree was sagging, yet only on one side. This didn't make sense since it wasn't facing heat, breeze, sun, or anything which might weaken it.
Sag continued. Balls actually began to fall off on their own.
The green color became progressively grey.
So today we took it down - in all my Christmases, this is the earliest I have ever participated in a funeral march for one of our trees.
The forever tree, boxed in our attic, was heard to snicker.