Wednesday, September 27, 2006
HELLO, MY NAME IS BOB
"I am a candy corn addict."
"Every year stores jump start Halloween by putting out bins of candy corn, and its henchcandy, pumpkins, bats, witches and corncobs. I can resist at first, and out of season, because I know what happens next. Once I get started I can't stop. Just another few. Just bite the yellow heads off the kernels. Then just the white tips, then you have to finish the orange part from the middle. I know the differences between manufacturers. I know fake yellow corn cobs are bogus. Only Banana flavored corn husks are authentic! We don't even buy the bagged corn - we go bulk and shovel... my pancreas has fallen out from all the sugar and I drag it around behind me like an old bag lady drags her bags. The only thing that stops me sat each binge is the sugar high followed by the sugar coma that follows as sure as day follows night. I have lost all self respect. Surely this is tied to an unhappy childhood.
The supermarket is just up the street. And I just ran out again..."