Snakes and ladders REVISED

At almost the end of May, the Texas Hill Country New Home/ Development scorecard is:

Scorpions: 6 (Terri got one with a shoe last night. This might call for a new pair. Right.)

Geckos: 4 (one really BIG one which was probably preggers with many babies!)

Mice: 8 or 9 - the count is climbing

Snakes: 5 1/2

Squashed frogs: 3

Spiders: many many: little fast ones; long legged superspiders; multi colored spiders; jumpers

TARANTULAS: 1 - and it was fast! Push it away with a broom and it charges AT the broom! And it's fast. About the size of a mouse. Spiders don't generally scare me, but this one did.

Rabbits the size of greyhounds: a) 12 or b) 2, repositioned

These numbers change like the tote board on the Jerry Lewis Telethon. Smaller numbers, but there you go.

Scorpions and Mice were on our property when they expired. One mouse was scraped off a sticky trap and limped away. I think he made it, but added one for him just in case. The others were sighted on dog walks.

Maybe construction is bringing out the vermin and scaly things - houses are going up faster than the male 'membership' at a high heel and lingerie convention.

The half snake was just that. All tail, no brain. Some men dream of this, but in another sense altogether.

I hate snakes. No good reason that I can tell. They totally freak me out.

I've come to view scorpions as earthbound wasps. This is because I haven't been stung.

BUUUUT, being a good husband, I will clean out the garage this weekend while my wife administers tranquilizing pharmaceuticals to me. There are MANY places where snakes can hold conventions under things. If I have a heart attack, you, as my designee, should start an investigation. If it's a rubber snake, Terri is after the life insurance money.