Saturday, June 18, 2005

What honks and squeaks?



As we cruised the Austin Farmer’s market in Republic square, a voice stood up and out, a twang lifted above the drum and hum by the fever of hucksterism.

“The social whirl will not spin properly if certain important things in life are not carefully attended to. Disgrace can follow disinterest all too quickly. Embarrassment can taint a whole family, betraying friendship and turning neighbors to stone.”

That caught my attention. I turned away from the pursuit of peaches, which were sold out anyway. We don’t have neighbors yet, but we certainly don’t want stone ones. Or stoned ones, either, unless the vibe is just right.

A small crowd had gathered.

“Today, science can sure so many social ills that we assume – wrongly- that a quick trip to the store will fix whatever ‘it’ is that has you down. Not so. Homeopathic remedies span the AGES and date back far beyond modern man.”

I remember snorting zinc gel every hour to fight a cold. It didn’t work, and now I am afraid of chain link fence posts. Homeopathic to me means drinking ‘tea’ that tastes like socks. But I digress.

The man was selling EMU oil. Apparently, a squeaky Emu can spell ostracism, or ostrichcism. We bought some granola and drove home.

No comments: